top hat James wedding

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to remix it

Pop will eat itself

Virtual hermit
top hat James wedding

I was a lot more comfortable being vulnerable and open
When I was younger and it wasn’t clear if I was or wasn’t joking
But so much is broken, just like fuck it, the fix is in
If i can’t hide in plain sight anymore I’ll just stay hidden
It’s been a minute since I left this domicile
No need to change my outfit, I rock it like it’s going out of style
It’s not in style? Ain’t no one here to tell me otherwise
It gets more difficult to stay inside during the summertime
But most of the time it’s just like any other time
Avoid personal interaction and human touch, shut the blinds
It’s been a while since I left this bachelor pad
I need to go to the market soon cause the food is going bad
The food is bad. I found it’s difficult to just cook for one
With healthy recipes, well, depending on what book they’re from
If you want to eat healthy you gotta dirty some dishes
The frozen dinners quickly ready to serve and it’s so delicious
It’s not delicious, it’s disgusting, but it satiates the hunger with a quickness
And hey, at least it’s something, at least it’s something
At most it’s nothing, fuck’s wrong with me? I don’t know, I’m just adjusting...

My 20’s were a roar, my 30’s were a blur
My 40’s, I’m not so sure, but I’mma make ‘em purr

I recognise myself in this video and song so much, it's not true.

London Can You Wait?
holy synth

And he said
"London, can you wait
For all the things I need to say
How long can you wait?".

Not many songs I know every single word to, without any reference - and can pretty much sing, but this is one. Olympian was a really important album, not just coming out (two of the songs 'Sleep Well Tonight' and 'Left Handed' became personal anthems, especially the latter which was a cryptic gay rights anthem), but when I started working and partying in London, and then moved there in 1999 this song resonated even more. 'London Can You Wait' and 'In The City' seemed to echo that newly arrived starry eyed thing, but also the down side along with Pulp's Different Class. Oddly the other two albums that soundtracked that era were Amateur OST and the recently released Pavement last album.

Glastonbury pics
behind camera

Should have posted this ages ago, here are my pics of Glastonbury 2014:

No real shocks here. It's got ever Glasto trope in one set! Oh I didn't get a crowdsurfer one. Almost every one then.

These aren't bad for my little LX5 anyway, although it struggled in low light, given the absolute deluge (the storm that closed Glasto for 45 minutes - complete shutdown on all stages, no power - is pictured 5th below, untweaked, it looked THAT scary) glutinous mud I was glad I didn't take the big camera.

More piccies!Collapse )

The Abnormal Heart
Farnese hercules
I need to watch it, but I thought this response to a friend's post about that era, I think it needs repeating here:

Also reading about the plot of The Normal Heart I'm struck by this: it's easy to dismiss those people as irresponsible, sluts 'who brought it on themselves' - hindsight is a terrible drug.

After being suppressed and forced into hidden bars and attacked by police, I can see why people went overboard with the sexuality and partying when they finally won the battles to do so, and it was hard won. So I can see how when this new disease arrived they just thought it was a ploy from the moral majority, trying to put them all back in their box, hidden away in shuttered bars and away from sight. I can see how that was a political thing, an important thing.

We now know it wasn't that, and it was actually sexually transmitted and the frequent partners helped that...but they didn't know that, and were suspicious of people telling them how to live, to stop having sex, without proof. And that was long coming...and by then a lot of people were infected.

Also that distrust of the status quo had it's uses in the Act UP! and other fights for recognition and help...not letting the medical community off the hook, or the governments.

It's easy to slut shame those people, but I see them as those people before me fighting for the right to love, shag, party, and indeed marry - they created that foundation. It's sad that a lot nowadays is formed around conforming, assimilating. I think we can learn a lot from those we lost about how we should react to the mainstream, and what political strategies we should use.

Because to the mainstream we're never going to be 100% accepted, to be totally respectable, and nor should we want to be - that would make us them.

Still not working...
Farnese hercules
Dunno why Firefox 29 Mac is such a problem for Livejournal, but still doesn't post/comment properly.

This is another reason why I'm not commenting as much as usual, and certainly it's not encouraging either posting or commenting when I have to switch from my usual browser to Safari JUST to do that. Hmm.

(I could do that Safe Mode thing, but those things have a tendency to nuke the plugins or settings...always the solution with Firefox issues, but like any Apple support/Pure Radio/etc resetting then reprogramming all your settings back in is a real's probably LJ's fault anyways, all other sites are fine.)

Gluten for punishment
Farnese hercules
I haven't really detailed much of the whole stomach thing, life-changing as it is.

Last August I suddenly started to get stomach cramps when I ate, and felt bloated and not hungry if I did for upto 12-16 hours, explosive diarrhea - this is why the walks suddenly stopped, being curled up in a ball in bed (or sometimes needing a toilet immediately) was not conducive to walking 5-10 miles from the nearest anything.

After changing my diet many times and failing (More fibre? feel worse. No milk? No change. Less shit food? Worse. Ironically the shit food is the less problematic, chips, processed meat etc).

So spoke to my doctor before Xmas, she mentioned FODMAP diet, and IBS and all the rest. Had the tests and apparently no for Coeliac disease, Crohns and Bowel Cancer, so it was the vague IBS diagnosis. Doctor kept pushing those peppermint tablets on me, which actually do work, but I was taking them like smarties. Minty-fresh breath and more worryingly minty-fresh shit, but expensive and still didn't solve the problem. It was better, but not great - still the odd attack, this was a few months ago.

I'd avoided pasta as that was one of the triggers along with pizza and ciabatta, and already gone lactose-free to rule that out (Almond milk is really nice, and has the benefit it actually doesn't go off as quickly as cow's milk, so that's stayed) and tried reducing and eliminating all FODMAP foods (basically stuff that ferments in your stomach, this includes beans I don't eat anyway, but also wheats, grains, mushrooms which I eat loads of being one of a couple of vegetables I eat, and chocolate) for a while. Didn't seem to make a difference. So ate the pasta and WHAM instant bout. This is when I started to think it was wheat/gluten based, I'd suspected it given some of the triggers (but others are tomato - me neither - and oats - which I switched to as part of granola, even gluten free granola makes me feel bad, but not the same way) - then my Dad called and said he thought he was wheat intolerant, he was having similar problems for the last three years mostly unknown to me. It's genetic btw.

So I think it's wheat or gluten - but like all detective stories it doesn't end that, it's not all the picture. Took me a long while to take wheat out of my diet completely and when I did I was surprised how I didn't feel shit after eating bread or anything with wheat, I'd gotten so used to 3-4 hours later feeling slightly crap than not having that, the absence of feeling crap (since stomach feeling bad has been a constant thing) was more surprising than it being bad. But had some gluten-free (which is the same as wheat-free usually) meals and felt really bad after them - could be mushrooms, could be tomato - most likely the former given both those meals were supposedly wheat/gluten-free but had those. We'll see.

But what annoys me, and I went on a sort of rant on Facebook about - is the reaction from people. Turns out the scientist bloke who fingered gluten a few years back has now found it isn't gluten at all (remember this is ONE study! Out of...not many), and all the people who think it's a fad and love to point fingers have come out the woodwork.

I actually don't give a fuck what it is, tbh. It could be fluffy space aliens or Wheat That's Heard Too Many Bad Songs for all I care, I just want it to stop...but the whole 'it's a fad' or 'it's stress' or 'it's in your head' rings alarms. Because I'm also asthmatic and have eczema, the former since I was 8 and the latter for the last 4-5 years - that was misdiagnosed, as these things tend to be. As might have been a wheat/allergy sensitivity, since all of those are also apparently symptoms of wheat sensitivity/intolerance.

Thing is, because it's not a sexy (read: has big grants or possible products to flog) part of medicine all these areas have few studies into them. A few about children with asthma, less about eczema and stomach stuff outside of Crohns, Coeliac and Cancer is a big area marked 'we don't know'. The studies about this are fairly new, and they only now are starting to realise about the 'gut brain' and the fact that it's a more complex nervous/bacterial system than they thought.

But until they find out WTF it is, some will treat you like you're a hypochondriac, that it's in your head, that it's a fad, that you're mad, bad or sad basically. This is the nature of the medical - and even worse wannabe Internet Medical - community. Don't understand it? Patient is making it up. I've got this a lot from the doctor, but I know my mind, well aware of stress levels and triggers, I've had to be as an asthmatic. And no, you can't unthink an attack...I've tried many times. You can lessen it, you can meditate yourself into calmer breathing, but the trigger/cause is still there. Dust, pollen, damp...but there are those who think it's all just cos you're stressed. Nope, it isn't.

Thing is I know there is a lot of bullshit attached to gluten-free stuff, the artisanal products, the woo. Some odd people are eating gluten free not because it gives them a hard time, but for dieting or fashion reasons - which I find weird cos GF food is not only hella-expensive, hard to find, it's also usually much less nice than the wheat alternative and NOT better for you unless you have Coeliac/Wheat/Gluten issues. It's a frankenfood, reading the ingredients is like a massive dictionary of food technology.

But it annoys me I have to fight through all these people who Know Better (but Know Nothing in fact - I wish they did, I'm happy for suggestions, but these people love to point to sole medical reports as if they have a medical degree, but they don't have anything except 'You're a bunch of losers' - umm, thanks for that important addition to the Future of Mankind). It reminds me of the people who think muscle spasms are just stress (nope, calcium/Vit D deficiency) and that eczema/asthma people can just change it through feeling happier. Umm, no. If it was that easy, and known, then people would happily take those 'cures'.

But it's easier to stigmatise people than listen to them, and easier to point and laugh than actually diagnose and research. And sadly too much of the former, and not enough of the latter. I'm not going to go off and start going all homeopathic (hence why I resisted the peppermint oil for a long time) but all clear that there is also Medical Woo - stuff We Don't Understand so will Mock. I won't be surprised if they find that some of the crap, additives, pesticides etc. in wheat is causing immune reaction triggers in people. Even the wheat version of a prion, maybe...but I doubt I'll get a sorry when they do.

In one way the diet people are correct, it is a fast way to lose weight, people keep telling me I've lost weight, people I know well/see often. I call it the Wheat Intolerance diet, otherwise known as Curl Up In A Ball diet. It's the only way darlings! :-/

So much for 'New Livejournal'
top hat James wedding
Firefox 29 Mac STILL doesn't work, I see. And still get that annoying 'never stops loading' thing, even after blocking all their adware.

Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood...
top hat James wedding

Baby, do you understand me now
Sometimes I feel a little mad
But don't you know that no one alive
Can always be an angel
When things go wrong I seem to be bad
But I'm just a soul whose intentions are good
Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood

If I seem edgy I want you to know
That I never mean to take it out on you
Life has it's problems and I get my share
And that's one thing I never meant to do
Because I love you

Listening to a lot of disco, a result of watching the excellent if badly sound-mixed Larry Levan Way party in NY on the live stream, and reminded how good this song is - and how it's a theme song of mine. Has a lot of personal resonance, and definitely goes out to John, not that he'd ever listen to this or even read this, LOL. A bit like the 'full' version of Movin' On Up (no, the version you hear is about half of it!) I'd love for someone to play this full version in a modern club setting. There'd probably be a riot where the kids throw their Ritalin out the pram :-P

This is the full 16 minute version, which I'm not sure I've ever heard (10 minute version yes - but the 12" was even LONGER!). It's also as I commented on Twitter, best thing about this version as a DJ, is you can go off and write a PhD thesis, have a meal, raise children and invade a country and it still hasn't finished...

Pop Goes The Easel
top hat James wedding

Meant to post this here as well as Radio Clash...I remember hearing about this documentary and seeing clips of the twist scene many years ago (about 37 mins in) and falling in love with Peter Blake's awkward/cute dancing. It's a strange scene, and a strange documentary actually...very kay-fabe, staged. But that bit always makes me laugh.

And he looks SO young, but always thought he was cute, and interesting he had a bit of Victoriana going on with that coat, moving on I guess from the denim and badges (if he ever wore that?).

Weird touches, like the cup. The same ringed cup appears in each artist's section, rather a sort of a mug version of the targets, I guess...which gain their own mythos from the fair...there are a lot of things like that. Weird it took me so long to actually watch it, though. And I didn't know even the title was borrowed - it's a Three Stooges film.

pub step
In other news, if you're not on my Twitters of Farcebook - I'm going to Glastonbury this year. I wasn't expecting to get tickets, in fact I failed on the first try, but I managed to get one in the resale early on Sunday. In fact it was a little bit like 'I'm up, half-asleep, fuck it, let's just put the browser into the constant refresh queue, I doubt it'll work...OH!'.

I'm going alone, and I think this is the last in the festivals I MUST see - Coachella, Bestival and now the grandaddy of them all, Glastonbury. Tickets over the years have been harder and harder to get, and I always forgot to register for the PhotoID, which always closed ages before the actual ticket sale, so I was left with a page saying 'you're out of luck, loser'. Also I was on a promise to go with someone, but it's reaching the second decade... Maybe I'll go again with them, and John in future. In fact there's discussion about hiring a camper van and John driving...but he wants to stay offsite, which to me isn't the point. I want that onsite experience, at least once. And who wants to walk miles to a remote campsite after drinking and seeing bands all day?

I know it's not the 'same' as previous 'classic' eras but I really don't care, I'm going as much for the experience as for the bands (which this year, despite moans looks really good). And also I've not done a festie 'alone' before, that will be a new one. The others have been trial runs - been good on weather for the other two, so half expecting it to chuck it down this time. Well that would be in keeping with the Glasto 'experience' LOL.

You are viewing fingertrouble